How to Survive Your Husband's Midlife Crisis
How the women of the Midlife Club dealt with their husbands' adultery and other midlife issues.

How to Survive Your Wife's Midlife Crisis
It isn't just men who have major issues at middle age. These husbands were searching for answers after their wives' midlife issues tore their marriages apart.

Journaling through His Midlife CrisisJournaling through His Midlife Crisis: Redefining Your Life As He Reinvents His - a journaling tool for women.

True Stories of AdulteryWhat causes a husband or wife to cheat? Can a marriage survive adultery? Stories from betrayers, betrayed and the other man or woman.

‘Q&A’

Changing Password

Q: I’m a member of the Midlife Club forum. I want to change my password. Can you help me?

A: Log in to your account then click on the Profile icon at the top of every page. For more instructions, click on the help? icon also at the top of every page.

Rocky Marriage

Q: Our marriage has been rocky for many years but I never dreamed my husband would suck the life out of me by having a relationship with a 20 something woman. It has now ended but I will never be the same.  I started counselling today but feel I can’t get over the pain.

A: Counseling is an excellent start. No, you never will be the same and neither will your marriage. You say the marriage has been rocky for many years. This will either help fix it or break it entirely.

Affairs?

Q: This is quite a difficult message for me to write. But in summary my husband had a midlife crisis last year (and I believe that it was coming on for a longtime). I have never been able to prove that anything happended but he certainly put out alot of signals that he was having affairs. I strongly believe that he mostly did it because he became very depressed with himself and life and used me as the scapegoat. And in addition he had at least one friend who helped him and has told him that it is perfectly okay for men to cheat. More »

Bad Times

Q: ok.. i have been going through some bad time’s with my spouce, he’s 48 and the last couple of mounth’s he has started drinking, very depressed, has pushed me and the kids away, and it’s tearing us apart. he doesnt spend time with us at all. he make’s excuses why we can’t talk, we lost our home two yrs ago and now live in a 5th wheel trailer, he feel’s that it’s his fault, which it isnt, he was laid off. he’s working now and has been, but between the bill’s and his child support. he cant make it. he feel’s like his has let his family down, and he say’s he’s a loser. im scared im gonna loose him.

A: Too many issues here for a quick answer. Join the Midlife Club forum and read, read, read. You’re dealing with the same issues that many members are dealing with. You can learn from their experience and ask for their support.

Changed Forum ID

Q: I can’t get into the forum under my old account. I have re-registered with my new email address. Can you switch my new email address to my old account so I have access?

A: I see that you did access the forum under your old account today. I need you to access your old account, send me a PM through the forum, and then I will be able to link the old and new emails together. Right now, I can’t verify that these emails belong to the same person. This is just a precaution I take especially when the IP addresses don’t match either.

Forgot User Name

Q: I think I registered two years ago and now totally forgot my password or my user name. Please help I wanted to get back in.

A: Go to the forum registration page and register again. If we find an existing account for your email address we will advise you the login name. If you don’t remember your password, please click the “forgot password” link on the login page. If there is no member with the email address you provide, you will be registered as a new member.

Thank You

Q: I just wanted to say thank you for this site – it has been invaluable. I didn’t realise why my considerate, loving, sweet partner had suddenly turned into someone who became annoyed by everything I do (and have always done), but after reading articles on your site, it all makes sense.

Thank you so much for your site – it has really helped me. I stupidly believed that (as he said) I was the cause of the discord in our relationship, but now I realise it isn’t my fault and no matter how I change, I’ll never be what he wants, because he doesn’t know what he wants.  More »

Husband’s Crisis

Q: Which Support Group do I choose if its ‘MY HUSBAND’ who has the deal? (Midlife etc.) Thank you! HumptyDumptyEtte

A: Since you CANNOT change your husband, you will have to learn how to deal with the current situation. Join the Midlife Club Forum and read, read, read.  You’ll see how other wives are handling the crisis their husbands’ actions are causing for them.

Chat

Q: Hi:  How do I access the chat rooms?  I don’t see any links to them.

A: The chat room is accessible through the Midlife Club forum. If you sign up for the forum you will have access to them.

Emailing Page

Q: Ohmigoodness, I needed to read this.  Everything in here is absolutely true.  How can I email this page so I can pass it on, and thank you for putting this on paper.  I have a 6’3 mess on my hands and he claims no responsibility for it.  Powerful words that I needed to read.  Thank you so much.

A: To email the HIS Midlife Crisis page, paste this link: http://midlifeclub.com/his-midlife-crisis into an email. If you’re planning to email the page to him so he can see himself and straighten up, you’ll be wasting your energy.

Help With Wife’s Crisis

Q: Need some support and help to deal with my wife’s midlife crisis. I know time and patience is key but what else is there to do? I do not want a divorce, I want to stay married to her, however i do not think the same is true from her. What to do?

A: It really doesn’t matter what you want if her mind is made up. What to do? Join the Midlife Club forum and read, read, read, and read some more and see how others have dealt with the exact same situation. This is new for you but it’s an old story to members of the forum.

Group Meetings?

Q: Can you tell me where I can go to “group’ meetings about “Mid-Life” crisis?  Somewhere in Los Angeles?  West Hollywood, Beverly Hills, or nearby???  HELP!!!!!

A: There are ongoing “virtual group meetings” on the Midlife Club forum including real time chat. We do not have organized meetings or group sessions. If you’re dealing with marital issues, you might also look for a local DivorceCare group.

Got the Speech

Q: I got the “speech” in febuary of this year after 28 years he doesnt love me and hes not attracted to me He says the clssic stuff I should have seen this coming I could go on and on. Our daughter and 3 sons are in a crisis / daughter was in rehab now her and our three grandsons are living with us for now.  My life is a mess and until febuary I thought I had the best marriage in the world I could go on and on but I wont. HELP!!!

A: Your story is repeated time after time on the Midlife Club forum. Register for the forum then read, read, read, and continue reading. This takes time, there are no quick fixes or fast answers.

Upset

Q: Hello;  i’am very upset. my husband came home and told me ha is not happy; did not see this coming . I am totally shocked. I asked him what he is not happy about he says he doesn;t know. please give me advise.

A: Same advice as given to everyone else: register and join The Midlife Club Forum, then read, read, read, and read some more. Almost everyone there has a similar story. There are no quick answers.

Forum Info

Q: My 40, soon to be 41, husband just walked out after 10 years of marriage. I never thought he was the type to do this. None of his reasons made since and I was distraught. Then I fell upon your site and read HIS Midlife crisis and most, if not all my questions were answered. He even stated in a letter that this was not a midlife crisis. I have never logged onto a forum before so could you please give me some instruction and pointers. More »

Forum

Q: registered but can’t access forum please send instructions

A: When you registered you would have immediately received an email confirming your registration. Your actual approval email may take several days. If approved, you will be sent an email with a link to click through to validate your email address. If you signed up with a bogus email address, you wouldn’t receive this validation email. Or, if your email is being filtered for spam, our validation/welcome email may have been blocked. If you used your regular email address, return to the log in page and have the email sent again.

How Long?

Q: do u have any information from couples who’s marriage have survived the husband’s mid life crisis? also how long does mlc typically take?

A: There is no “typical” time when talking about midlife crisis. It will be done when it is done. It isn’t an illness that can be “cured,” it is a life transition that resolves over time. More »

The Midlife Club Forum

Q: Please tell me why I cannot access this forum and advise.

A: First, have you registered and been approved for membership in the forum? If so, did you click on the link for the midlife club forum?
http://midlifeclubforum.com

If you haven’t registered then you need to Register for Forum Membership. As soon as you register you will receive an email confirming receipt of your request. Since all membership requests are reviewed prior to approval, it may take several days before you receive the email with your Forum ID and Password. The email will also contain a link you must click through to validate your account before you can log in for the first time.

Mid Life Wives Club?

Q: On your website, you reference Mid Life wives Club website. When I try to log on it goes to you. Is it supposed to? I’m confused. I wanted to interact with others in my position.

A: It is the same. Register for the forum here. Once you are approved for membership (which could take several days) you will be where you want to be.