We men have three basic needs; we will have them until we die. If we are transgressed against in the meeting of these needs we will fight irrationally to meet them. If we feel at a deficit for them we will seek other avenues to get them. We will commit all our energies to achieve them. We are bestowed with greatest honor when we receive them.

What are they?

We seek to be Respected.

We seek to be Appreciated.

We seek to be Desired.

Any honor, any recognition of high achievement bestowed upon us, any value we place on life, includes these three ingredients. Of all institutions most basic in life, we look for these in marriage.

I will not belabour the point. It stands alone on its own merit. Anyone who reads them can fill in the blanks to their situation. Really, all other elements we seek fall under the scope of these three, don’t they? If all three are present then the other needs we have fall into line.\

Posted on the Midlife Club Forum by forum member Newman. Visit his site, FortySixty.org, which is primarily focused on men in crisis.