Q: This is quite a difficult message for me to write. But in summary my husband had a midlife crisis last year (and I believe that it was coming on for a longtime). I have never been able to prove that anything happended but he certainly put out alot of signals that he was having affairs. I strongly believe that he mostly did it because he became very depressed with himself and life and used me as the scapegoat. And in addition he had at least one friend who helped him and has told him that it is perfectly okay for men to cheat.

My husband has never completely admitted to anything and will not acknowledge that he put me through a whole year of misery. It is just recently that he has slowly tried to make amends without voicing any acknowledgement and has tried to convince me he is sorry. However, I have never been able to completely express my anger and hurt and I keep everything inside. How can I handle this? How can I talk with him about everything if he won’t acknowledge it? Any advice you can provide would be most appreciated.

A: Please, if you haven’t already, join the Midlife Club forum. What you’re dealing with is what many members of the forum are currently dealing with. Any one of them could have written exactly what you wrote. Read their stories and then post your own. You’ll get lots of support from people who are right where you are.